SPECIAL Agent Dale Cooper is a special man. Not only does he possess the top-notch–creme de la creme, if you will–intelligence of the Federal Bureau of Investigation’s finest but he also has the brave soul of a man willing to cross into the land of dreams, demons, and giants to save the lives of those preyed on by a mysterious murderer. The main character of David Lynch’s Twin Peaks loves good coffee, good pie, breakfast and most importantly: Donuts. Fortunately for him, so do the local deputies and sheriff. The local law enforcement is housed in an appropriately wood paneled office where Lucy, the faithful and oddly competent secretary, keeps all of the deputies in donuts, artfully laying them out on the conference table (where they do in fact cover the table) each morning.
Watching enough episodes of Twin Peaks will convince anyone that clearly the only way to consume donuts is by first buying about four dozen of them and then lining them up on the closest thing to a conference table that one has around –stacked two high and arranged in neat rows (a mirror of Lucy’s own careful donut presentation). So that is what we, the residents of Larchwood Ave, did this past Sunday. In the early Sunday morning we set out on our donut expedition. We decided to avoid the large monstrosity that is Dunkin Donuts and opted instead for a small coffee and donut shop on 43rd and Chestnut called Pure Donuts. We trooped in and stared at the cases of donuts. For the first time in my adult life there was no agony involved in choice. Four of this, five of that, three of the strange looking ones in the corner with the blue sprinkles. We laughed as we chose more and more. Soon we had filled up three white pastry boxes at which point we departed, the fatty sweet scent of three dozen donuts following in our wake.
Returning home, we placed the donuts on the table, brewed a large pot of coffee, and dug in. Check out this website and you will have an idea of what was arranged upon our dinning room table (what I really would like to know is what sort of class you would have to take to get to list donuts. Just saying…).
Gathered around the table with Twin Peaks playing in the background, we dug in with the gusto of the hungriest deputies in Twin Peaks. Delicious fried sugar dough filled our mouths and was washed down with the bitter darkness of the first cup of morning coffee. I think, in retrospect, it was that first bite that was the best. We each continued on through that first donut and began on our second and thirds. It was somewhere around the middle of that second donut we were all feeling a little worse for the donut. But how often do you get to live the dream of a table full of donuts?
I thought I would never want to eat another donut, but the stomach stretching, sugar-high pain has since passed and in the recording of our donut feast I really think that I could go for another…
Live on Breakfast Questers!